Melissa's Birthday
From the series: "STAND OUT IN THE CROWD"
by Frank Allocco, Sr.
Series Introduction
Some eye opening basketball statistics:
The beauty of sports is not in becoming a great player, it is the learning of valuable Life Skills that will serve players throughout their lives. If we look beyond the focus of winning and achieving success, the arena of competition is one of the finest classrooms a young player could ever have.
Some eye opening basketball statistics:
- 2.9% of high school players will play college basketball.
- Less than 1 in 75, or 1.3 percent of NCAA Seniors will be drafted by an NBA Team.
- About 3 in 10,000 players (0.03 percent) of high school seniors will eventually be drafted by an NBA team.
The beauty of sports is not in becoming a great player, it is the learning of valuable Life Skills that will serve players throughout their lives. If we look beyond the focus of winning and achieving success, the arena of competition is one of the finest classrooms a young player could ever have.
March 27th is always a day that has a special place in my heart as I recall the birthday of Melissa Ann Coronel, an amazing young woman who was a unifying force on one of the greatest teams I have ever coached. The elementary school children on our Saint Agnes Girls CYO Basketball Team were an incredible collection of hard-working youngsters with magnetic personalities that truly became family as they competed with an intense spirit of love and unity. Tragically, this team experienced great loss later in life as two of our teammates, Cindy Lowe and Melissa Coronel, passed away at the beginning of young adulthood, their amazing lives cut short by tragic illnesses.
Melissa Ann Coronel was an outstanding player known for her ability to shoot and rebound. Living across the street from Saint Agnes School, she was a constant at our outdoor practices on the hot asphalt schoolyard basketball courts. It was truly a blessing to coach this team and see their friendships strengthening and basketball skills developing. Their discipline, sacrifice, and love superseded individual desires as ten individuals formed an amazing team that made their mark in the history of Northern California girls youth basketball. Melissa was a stabilizing force with her spirit and magnetic personality earning the love and admiration of her teammates and her talent and skills contributing to the incomparable success this team experienced.
Upon graduation from Saint Agnes School, she joined several of her teammates on the Basketball Team at Carondelet High School. Her sharp shooting skills and intuitive leadership led to success at the high school level with their team contending in postseason play each year. At the conclusion of her high school days, Melissa attended Dominican University of California in San Rafael, then married Giovanni Luna and moved to Texas. She was excited to settle down and enjoy her new family life in the Southwest.
Melissa Ann Coronel was an outstanding player known for her ability to shoot and rebound. Living across the street from Saint Agnes School, she was a constant at our outdoor practices on the hot asphalt schoolyard basketball courts. It was truly a blessing to coach this team and see their friendships strengthening and basketball skills developing. Their discipline, sacrifice, and love superseded individual desires as ten individuals formed an amazing team that made their mark in the history of Northern California girls youth basketball. Melissa was a stabilizing force with her spirit and magnetic personality earning the love and admiration of her teammates and her talent and skills contributing to the incomparable success this team experienced.
Upon graduation from Saint Agnes School, she joined several of her teammates on the Basketball Team at Carondelet High School. Her sharp shooting skills and intuitive leadership led to success at the high school level with their team contending in postseason play each year. At the conclusion of her high school days, Melissa attended Dominican University of California in San Rafael, then married Giovanni Luna and moved to Texas. She was excited to settle down and enjoy her new family life in the Southwest.
"I became lost in my memories, transported back to the tiny indoor court at Stanley School in Lafayette where “my girls” fell behind for one of the few times that year."
Several years later, I received a phone call from Lexi Brown Ravarino, one of her best friends and teammate on the special “Fighting Irish” teams. As her voice broke, she sadly informed me that Melissa had died of a massive blood infection. This unbelievable news broke the hearts of all of her loved ones as her illness had progressed rapidly, taking her promising life at the tender age of 27 years old. Her solemn church service, conducted just 100 feet from the outdoor courts where she had grown and bonded with her coaches and teammates, was filled with stunned family and friends who struggled to understand this sudden and shocking loss.
Thirteen years later, Melissa’s mother called me and asked if my wife and I, her two former coaches, could attend a celebration of her daughter’s life on March 27th, what would have been her 40th birthday. When the day arrived, we parked in the cul-de-sac and walked toward the sidewalk that weaved its way into her home. I remembered the countless times I had seen Melissa briskly leave this front door on the short walk across the street for practice on the tiny outdoor courts of Saint Agnes. My spirits were brightened with the thought of her huge smile, “big hair,” and enormous heart that embraced and warmed her teammates on good days and bad.
Her loving home was vibrant, overflowing with relatives and many of her teammates from our glorious elementary school years. After an hour of visiting and reminiscing, her mother invited me to visit Melissa’s bedroom. The modest chamber was a journey into her past, with photos of family and friends and several plaques and ribbons from the many league, playoff, and tournament titles we had won.
There was a framed version of “My Girls”, a poem that I had written and given to the girls after one of our most remarkable and compelling victories. As I reverently picked up the gold frame, I became lost in my memories, transported back to the tiny indoor court at Stanley School in Lafayette where “my girls” fell behind for one of the few times that year. I remembered a special timeout called when our team trailed by 11 points with 5:30 to go in the Tournament Championship Game. I was surrounded in green and gold as I knelt on the wooden gym floor and begged “my girls” to “make stops” as we could not allow another basket. As my excitement grew, their arms locked together in love, tightening our circle, their commitment speaking louder than my words as they quietly pledged to play for each other.
I remember the amazing feeling in that huddle, the confidence, the trust, the deepness in Melissa’s intense eyes, her head nodding, she and her teammates leaning on every word as I challenged them to give more. This remarkable “band of sisters” eagerly left that huddle with a sense of urgency that demanded every loose ball and every rebound. Their incomparable talent, love, and loyalty manifested itself in a defensive wall that stymied our opponent and led to a 13-0 finish and a two-point victory!
Thirteen years later, Melissa’s mother called me and asked if my wife and I, her two former coaches, could attend a celebration of her daughter’s life on March 27th, what would have been her 40th birthday. When the day arrived, we parked in the cul-de-sac and walked toward the sidewalk that weaved its way into her home. I remembered the countless times I had seen Melissa briskly leave this front door on the short walk across the street for practice on the tiny outdoor courts of Saint Agnes. My spirits were brightened with the thought of her huge smile, “big hair,” and enormous heart that embraced and warmed her teammates on good days and bad.
Her loving home was vibrant, overflowing with relatives and many of her teammates from our glorious elementary school years. After an hour of visiting and reminiscing, her mother invited me to visit Melissa’s bedroom. The modest chamber was a journey into her past, with photos of family and friends and several plaques and ribbons from the many league, playoff, and tournament titles we had won.
There was a framed version of “My Girls”, a poem that I had written and given to the girls after one of our most remarkable and compelling victories. As I reverently picked up the gold frame, I became lost in my memories, transported back to the tiny indoor court at Stanley School in Lafayette where “my girls” fell behind for one of the few times that year. I remembered a special timeout called when our team trailed by 11 points with 5:30 to go in the Tournament Championship Game. I was surrounded in green and gold as I knelt on the wooden gym floor and begged “my girls” to “make stops” as we could not allow another basket. As my excitement grew, their arms locked together in love, tightening our circle, their commitment speaking louder than my words as they quietly pledged to play for each other.
I remember the amazing feeling in that huddle, the confidence, the trust, the deepness in Melissa’s intense eyes, her head nodding, she and her teammates leaning on every word as I challenged them to give more. This remarkable “band of sisters” eagerly left that huddle with a sense of urgency that demanded every loose ball and every rebound. Their incomparable talent, love, and loyalty manifested itself in a defensive wall that stymied our opponent and led to a 13-0 finish and a two-point victory!
'With my voice cracking with emotion, I respectfully addressed this loving assembly mentioning how unique Melissa and her teammates were as they established themselves as one of the finest Girl’s CYO Teams in the history of the East Diablo CYO League.'
My nostalgic journey was interrupted by her mother’s voice as she continued the tour of the many mementos that had framed Melissa’s amazing life. It was clear that Saint Agnes CYO was an essential part of her foundation, that she had treasured the experience and was proud of our team and of her own significant accomplishments.
My somber mood shifted swiftly as I entered the family room on Stillman Court. It was clear that there was no room for sadness tonight as their young relatives ran throughout the house playing and laughing while the adults reminisced in an endless supply of special, treasured memories. As darkness descended, the celebrants, a loving mixture of teammates, family, and friends, respectfully gathered in tribute on the court outside her home.
With the setting sun framing our gathering, her mother asked me to share some thoughts on my relationship with her special child. With my voice cracking with emotion, I respectfully addressed this loving assembly mentioning how unique Melissa and her teammates were as they established themselves as one of the finest Girl’s CYO Teams in the history of the East Diablo CYO League. I spoke of the incredible standard they had set, how all of the talented high school teams I had coached aspired to measure up to them as they attempted to mimic the intensity, love, and togetherness of this remarkable team. I referred to countless youth basketball clinics where I would reference this team as an amazing collaboration of talent and teamwork that had earned the respect and admiration of coaches and teams throughout Northern California.
My somber mood shifted swiftly as I entered the family room on Stillman Court. It was clear that there was no room for sadness tonight as their young relatives ran throughout the house playing and laughing while the adults reminisced in an endless supply of special, treasured memories. As darkness descended, the celebrants, a loving mixture of teammates, family, and friends, respectfully gathered in tribute on the court outside her home.
With the setting sun framing our gathering, her mother asked me to share some thoughts on my relationship with her special child. With my voice cracking with emotion, I respectfully addressed this loving assembly mentioning how unique Melissa and her teammates were as they established themselves as one of the finest Girl’s CYO Teams in the history of the East Diablo CYO League. I spoke of the incredible standard they had set, how all of the talented high school teams I had coached aspired to measure up to them as they attempted to mimic the intensity, love, and togetherness of this remarkable team. I referred to countless youth basketball clinics where I would reference this team as an amazing collaboration of talent and teamwork that had earned the respect and admiration of coaches and teams throughout Northern California.
"...every act of this team was based on love and friendship. They played for each other, worked hard for each other, and never did anything to let each other down."
I concluded my remembrance commenting that every act of this team was based on love and friendship. They played for each other, worked hard for each other, and never did anything to let each other down. Regardless of the happiness of victory or the sadness of defeat, the one constant was their overwhelming commitment to their friends. They were the epitome of togetherness at 13; the embodiment of what every team should be. And here we were, 27 years later, still a team, middle aged moms gathering to honor a fallen friend and beloved teammate on her birthday. Despite the passage of time, we remain eternally committed to her memory, appreciative of her life, and grateful for the impact she had on the lives of everyone she touched. It is without question that the success of the Saint Agnes team was not their abilities, it was the love, loyalty, and commitment they had then and continue to live today that truly sets them apart and continues to lead to their exceptional success.
As each family member, friend and teammate released one of the 40 green and gold balloons, our eyes looked upward as we watched them floating, gently drifting, each weaving their way on a celebratory journey toward the heavens. As the individual balloons of a loving congregation rose above us in the twilight, I could feel the commitment, strength and power of that green and gold huddle once again. Love surrounded and energized us in the unifying spirit of Melissa as we joined together becoming her team once again.
It has been five years since that extraordinary evening and I am eternally grateful for the cherished memories and enduring lessons of a gifted life. The inspiration of Melissa’s spirit propels us to recognize not only the fragility of our existence but the beauty of life. Our families and friends will inevitably change over time but the loss of our loved ones are to be celebrated, not mourned, as they continue to live within the hearts of all they have touched.
As each family member, friend and teammate released one of the 40 green and gold balloons, our eyes looked upward as we watched them floating, gently drifting, each weaving their way on a celebratory journey toward the heavens. As the individual balloons of a loving congregation rose above us in the twilight, I could feel the commitment, strength and power of that green and gold huddle once again. Love surrounded and energized us in the unifying spirit of Melissa as we joined together becoming her team once again.
It has been five years since that extraordinary evening and I am eternally grateful for the cherished memories and enduring lessons of a gifted life. The inspiration of Melissa’s spirit propels us to recognize not only the fragility of our existence but the beauty of life. Our families and friends will inevitably change over time but the loss of our loved ones are to be celebrated, not mourned, as they continue to live within the hearts of all they have touched.
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